001. every story is a song // open post.

[kyriff]

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[kyriff]

[And he's shy all over again, because that simple compliment was enough to blow all of his resolve out of the water. Ducking his gaze, bringing a nervous hand to the back of his neck.]

Um. Thanks.

[It's good that it's kind of dark here, because his cheeks have heated up like anything.]

[larue]

[ An awkward silence cuts through him and settles over his bones -- because what do you say when apologies don't seem enough?

He's flashing back to Brianna's birthday bash, to the way he'd been watching Rethe and that moment of shiiiit when their eyes had met over the crowd and he'd only had enough in him to promptly turn around and duck away.

He'd made it a point to avoid looking at Rethe that night, had also zoned Rethe out in earnest the following day -- or had tried to, because sitting with the Hounds had been a helpful distraction up until the point the angel had begged off with the excuse of feeling unwell and Stan had directed the question Josh, do angels get sick? at him.

And then he'd had to deliberately focus on football plays in order to block out the memory of the way Rethe had been for the rest of the night -- doing his best to have fun but somehow failing to do so completely, his smiles always coming a second too late.

Getting away had been easy. Joining Yulia on that trip to Norway, focusing on something else, because then he didn't have to deal with the confusing feelings of feeling something for Rethe, but failing to reconcile it with the fact that... it wasn't necessarily... well.

Seriously, what can you say when sorry doesn't seem enough? ]

[kyriff]

[And it's kind of funny, because Rethe's thinking back to a number of things himself: that fateful exchange that they had in the club, the look Josh had gotten. It's related to all of those other no-so-safe encounters, the countless times when Cen or Cisco or somebody from Haven had to save somebody from Rethe.

That is how he looks at it: people having to save people from him. It's the pull, perhaps, that comes with being something well beyond human and geared completely towards being unreachable and inspiring. Being too beautiful for words, too perfect. It had been that very thing, really, that had made Aidan Clayce - his own husband - doubt for so long that Rethe had been in love with him, and that he had been in love with Rethe.]

I'm... I'm going to go and get a drink.

[Join me?

Please?

If that's okay.

He kind of really doesn't want to lose another one, and miss another opportunity just because of what he was.]

[larue]

I'll join you, [ Josh says quickly -- perhaps, he feels, a little too quickly, and he backtracks internally, offering a small smile at Rethe, bordering on apologetic.

And then, quietly: ] I...if that's okay.

With you. [ Finish your sentences, Josh. ] That... I join you, I mean.

[kyriff]

[And in your head, Joshua LaRue, Makoto is watching the proceedings with amusement. Good thing there is no commentary (yet).

Outside, Rethe is looking genuinely surprised, and pleased. The smile widens before he can stop it.]

Okay. That would be nice.

[larue]

[ A nod. A shy one. ]

Lead the way. [ The words are out before he can think twice about them -- a variation of the same line he'd used on those walks they used to share. ]

[kyriff]

[That isn't missed on Rethe at all, and... well. It's kind of nice? He can't really describe it. He's not used to this.

Somehow, though, that's okay.

So he's leading them both to the bar, nodding once in Cen's direction (I'm okay, don't worry), and smiling in Josh's direction. The stool beside him is wide open.

Hopefully, he'll take it?]

[larue]

[ Casting a glance at Cen and nodding acknowledgingly to the werewolf, and then sliding into the stool beside Rethe, but mindful of keeping a respectful distance.

Falling quiet again.

He's... not really sure what to say, to be honest. ]

[kyriff]

[So maybe even after he's gotten his customary bottle of Jack and smoked through one two cigarettes, he's still not sure what to say either.]

Um...

[This is hard.]

[larue]

[ Now or never, right? ]

I'm sorry. [ Looking over now, his own beer lightly cupped between two palms as it stands on the countertop. ] For...

For being a jerk. And for avoiding you.

[kyriff]

It's okay.

[It really was. Mostly.

...Well no, it wasn't, but...]

I figured that you would have. I mean, this sort of happens a lot, so... [Right. Let's try that again.] I'm sorry too.

[larue]

[ Again, it's Aidan's words in his head, that quiet moment when he'd fessed up and apologized only to be told that it happens, but that it was, in the end, okay.

Running a hand through his hair now, eyes fixed again on his beer. ]

Don't apologize, [ glancing over now, gaze faltering, justa little. ] You've... you've got nothing to apologize for, Rethe.

[ A light fist with one hand, around his lighter. ] And I--

[ Softly: ] I didn't mean to.

I was just really happy that we got to talk again. And that you played those songs. And... [ nodding, sheepish. ] I didn't feel so lost anymore. And then...

[ A helpless laugh. ]

[kyriff]

You have been going through a rough time lately.

[And he's reaching out for Josh's wrist without really thinking about it. He just wanted to make sure that they really WERE good, that he could be there for the Sin-Eater again.]

It's okay. I mean... [A small smile.] We're here now, right?

[They could start over again, from a better place. Maybe Rethe could finally let himself have that with somebody else.]

[larue]

[ He actually worries at his bottom lip for a second, as if debating on something.

And really, Makoto doesn't even need to dig too deep to know that Josh is hyperaware of that hand on his wrist. ]

[kyriff]

[Have a quiet sigh at the back of your head, Josh.

You can deal with this one step at a time, you know. Besides... he's kind of waiting on an honest response here.

Outside of that, Rethe was tilting his head, looking at Josh in concern. What was he thinking? He could always read into it, but that felt too invasive.]

[larue]

[ A quiet... Thanks, Makoto, because a boost of courage was kind of what he needed.

Turning his arm palm up, and looking over as he smiles and gives Rethe's hand a reassuring squeeze.

Saying nothing, just the smile. Just the silent acknowledgement of Yeah, we're good. ]

[kyriff]

[And he's relieved beyond words, and so overwhelmed with relief that he's a little shaky, a little giddy, and feeling a whole lot better that it's beyond anything that he's had to handle for a while. It shows on his face: there's no reason to hide it.]

So, um... can we still do movies sometime?

[larue]

[ And just like that -- they're okay.

A playful nudge then, shoulder to shoulder; but his hand stays where it is. Because he needs it just as much. ]

Yeah, [ the unspoken, incredulous of course. ] Would kind of suck if we decided not to do that since we didn't really get to start.

[kyriff]

True.

[He likes this. He really, really likes this. It's hard to feel safe around anyone else beyond the usuals, but now...

Well. Now, someone else seems to be working his way into that circle.]

Just say when. I'll make time.